Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Back to Work & Bachelor Recap.

After a glorious snow day yesterday, I'm back at the office today.  Even though the courthouse is closed, I'm here.  Not that I'm bitter or anything.

Onto the Bachelor!  Did you guys know it was Michelle's birthday?  I know you might have missed it since she only said it about a hundred times.  But at least she was humble and sweet about it being her birthday.  Oh, that's right.  She was a b***h.  More about her later.

First, it's Ashley's turn for a totally unrealistic date!  Brad "has a suprise for her."  (Side note: this is a HUGE pet peeve of mine.  The Bachelor/ettes have virtually nothing to do with planning the dates, yet they all act like they arranged these magical evenings.  And the girls/guys gush about how thoughtful they were in planning such nights.  Seriously, do you people not know how this works?)  Anyway, he takes her to a carnival that's been created just for the two of them.

I'll grant that it was a pretty awesome date.  Brad and Ashley the Bouncy Dentist hit it off pretty well.  She'll probably stick around for a while.

Then time for the make out date, I mean the PSA filming date with 15 women.  The commercial shoot has become as much of a staple to the Bachelor as helicopters.  Oh, and did I mention that it was Michelle's birthday?  She's thirty, in case you missed it the first ten times she said it.  Brad and the "ladies" shoot commercials to promote blood donation.  Because what says "please give blood" like a threesome with two semi-dressed girls and a vampire?  

My favorite quote of the night was on this date.  By the time Brad has made out with at least five women, those left out are getting pretty unhappy, including our birthday girl, who has stormed off because it's not how she envisioned spending her 30th birthday.  Totally serious, Brad says, "I didn't know there was that much drama going on."  Really, dude?  You didn't think making out with those women would create drama?  Oh, well he probably hadn't yet heard that it was Michelle's birthday so he couldn't have known that he was supposed to blow of the other 14 women to spend the day with her alone.

So, the soft-core porn date ended, and segued into the "Pretty Woman" date (per our wordsmith Bachelor Brad) with Jackie, who I thought was super-sweet.  Brad got pretty freaked out when she told him that she had only had two serious relationships and didn't date anyone in college.  Oh well.  I guess Brad and I didn't have a chance.  I have no idea why this freaked him out so much.  Hmmm... maybe because she said she was "selective"?  Meaning, she's not going to fall in love with him just because he's hot and the Bachelor.  Brad apparently likes his women stupid and undiscerning.  We'll see how long a girl with a brain lasts.

The most exciting part of the evening was the rose ceremony when Raichel (the "energy suck") and Melissa got into a major cat fight (that had been cooking since the porn group date).  Melissa went and whined to Brad about Raichel and said the second-best quote of the night, "I'm sorry, I had onions on my pizza for lunch, and I feel like I'm so like embarassed about it.  Hehehehehe.  I'm sorry."  Brad is pretty gallant, listens to the crazy girl and moves on his merry way, eliminating both Raichel and Melissa.  Thank goodness he had the good sense to eliminate that drama when he saw it.

So, what did y'all think?  Were you sad like me that we didn't see more than 30 seconds of Fangs?  

Oh, take a look at this recap-- I was laughing hysterically, which wasn't great considering I was at work when I read it.  :)  


  1. Okay, I probably will come back once I actually watch this episode but I had to comment real quick and tell you how much I laughed reading this- you are so funny!

  2. I was like 9 kinds of glad that he eliminated the trouble makers. But, I think that Allie and what's-his-name (was it Robert? Roberto? I can't remember.) had a lot to do with that. Either way I'm glad they're gone. I would have loved to slap BOTH of them!

  3. this gave me a laugh. srsly how many times could she talk about her birthday.. haha.
    love it!

    ps i gave you an award go take a look! :)

  4. Is Raichel pronounced Rachel? If so, I don't like that spelling! ;) I prefer the right way (which of course is my way). ;)

    I'm sorry that Fangs wasn't on it too long. I loved your tweets during this, they were SO entertaining!!

    And for the record, I couldn't be with a guy who made out with that many girls on national TV. I don't care how cute or how rich!!


  5. Okay Okay, I just had to come back since I just watched this weeks episode and I wanted you to know...

    My 23rd birthday is on March 16th. Thats my birthday.

  6. Whew. I love the crazies a little bit, just because they make things so interesting. But, I'm happy that he had enough sense to get rid of the drama!

    I did love the girl who had to ask him some seriously important questions like, "Starbucks or the Coffee Bean?" Clearly need-to-know answers, right there. hahaha.

    And, yes - we just started all the Blackacre, fee simple, remainder stuff. Eeeeeek!